I’ve recently decided that I need to focus more on what matters to me. This is not from some conceit to gain more, or be more productive. It’s more about getting in touch with what really matters to me on a profound level. Finding meaning if you like. I feel like I’ve lost touch with some of the ideals that I had as a child. Ideals which, upon reflection, I should never have let go of, and which I’m puzzled that I did let go of.
With this in mind, I’ve been meditating; following a course of meditation from a place which I respect.
One of the notions that came up during the meditations was the idea of ‘the last time’. The notion that almost every moment might be the last time that you do something.
Perhaps this is the last time that I’ll sit at my computer. Perhaps the exchange that I had with a loved family member will the last one that I have.
On the surface, it all sounds quite morbid, but if you pull at that thought for a moment, it’s profoundly positive. It encourages being more present and making the most of right now. Appreciating what you have in this moment. Even the things that I don’t enjoy, on this level have some sense of pleasure.
I don’t know if I’ll be able to keep this approach going, but I’m certainly going to try.